Dear parents.
Lately I have come across a weird phenomenon goin on wherever I look. I agree it's something that's been present in our society since ages past, but having witnessed some really awkward situations faced by people am close to, I feel like putting some voice to it.
What am talking about here is the way our parents keep interfering with every little aspect of our life. Don't get me wrong here. I am not going to lecture about how parents should let their children be, or how they should not be giving advice on every small thing. I am a complete mamma's girl and can't take a single decision without her advice(and why shouldn't it be so, she has seen more of life than me). But there needs to be a limit to such interference.
Just weeks ago I witnessed a friend of mine being forced to get engaged to someone in whom he has no interest whatsoever. He agreed to it only because his mother's health is getting affected. Now that's some good reason I agree. But his parents are forcing him to get married because their family members and society is pointing out that he's getting on in age(he's in his early 30's by the way).
The weirdest part is, when I discussed it with some elders I know, they all agreed with what his parents did.' What would the society say'? is their concern.
I say "to hell with society" . it's two peoples life we are talking about here. If he's not happy how will he keep his wife happy. If neither are happy how will they continue in such a marriage.
Another incident I got to know was, where a 30year old friend of mine tried to start working. She is a mother of two and is planning of joining a playschool as a teacher. She has even planned of joining both her kids at same place so that she can take care of her kids as well as work. But how does her family react? Well, they feel she is neglecting her family and her duties and she's the worst mother on this planet. Her in-laws want her to quit even before she has started.
Yet another incident is where an adult man decided to grow a nice beard. That's the fashion currently, right? Oh but wait, here comes the onslaught of family members. His mama goes' beta what happened, is everything fine, why this devdas look? You shouldn't go out with such big beard, what would people think? If that wasn't enough, other relatives added to the drama with one liners like,' you look really old', 'why would a you g guy want to have a beard'. Guys..it's just a beard, not an attempt to suicide. Why such drama?
There are many more examples of such interferences by family members in something so intimate and personal to a person. I ask whether parents and other relatives should not stop and think twice before they start asking what the society would think. Should they not be more worried about what their own children think or feel. Shouldn't they just let their kids be?
P.S: I have to go tell my three year old son not to think of becoming a balloon walah...after all, what would the society think?
What am talking about here is the way our parents keep interfering with every little aspect of our life. Don't get me wrong here. I am not going to lecture about how parents should let their children be, or how they should not be giving advice on every small thing. I am a complete mamma's girl and can't take a single decision without her advice(and why shouldn't it be so, she has seen more of life than me). But there needs to be a limit to such interference.
Just weeks ago I witnessed a friend of mine being forced to get engaged to someone in whom he has no interest whatsoever. He agreed to it only because his mother's health is getting affected. Now that's some good reason I agree. But his parents are forcing him to get married because their family members and society is pointing out that he's getting on in age(he's in his early 30's by the way).
The weirdest part is, when I discussed it with some elders I know, they all agreed with what his parents did.' What would the society say'? is their concern.
I say "to hell with society" . it's two peoples life we are talking about here. If he's not happy how will he keep his wife happy. If neither are happy how will they continue in such a marriage.
Another incident I got to know was, where a 30year old friend of mine tried to start working. She is a mother of two and is planning of joining a playschool as a teacher. She has even planned of joining both her kids at same place so that she can take care of her kids as well as work. But how does her family react? Well, they feel she is neglecting her family and her duties and she's the worst mother on this planet. Her in-laws want her to quit even before she has started.
Yet another incident is where an adult man decided to grow a nice beard. That's the fashion currently, right? Oh but wait, here comes the onslaught of family members. His mama goes' beta what happened, is everything fine, why this devdas look? You shouldn't go out with such big beard, what would people think? If that wasn't enough, other relatives added to the drama with one liners like,' you look really old', 'why would a you g guy want to have a beard'. Guys..it's just a beard, not an attempt to suicide. Why such drama?
There are many more examples of such interferences by family members in something so intimate and personal to a person. I ask whether parents and other relatives should not stop and think twice before they start asking what the society would think. Should they not be more worried about what their own children think or feel. Shouldn't they just let their kids be?
P.S: I have to go tell my three year old son not to think of becoming a balloon walah...after all, what would the society think?
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